wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
