Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Randomize
