im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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