The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Shame - the story of my life.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
