mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
