Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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