I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
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