? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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