I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We have so much sex to catch up on
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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