So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
