I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
