You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
