Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We had to coat check the pizza.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
