FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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