So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
