I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I'm at about main and main street
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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