I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
