I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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