My first STD was from a foam party
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize