so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
