i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
