I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize