can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
