just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
