I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
