Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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