can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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