I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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