Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
