I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I need mimosas to revive my soul
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
