Texts From Last Night

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  (905): View more from Toronto

  Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat

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  (905): Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat http://tfl.nu/wtwy
  Replies (10) Good night (3260) Bad night (1342)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one

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  (336): A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one http://tfl.nu/284v
  Replies (25) Good night (8036) Bad night (746)
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  (425): View more from Washington

  the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side

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  (425): the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side http://tfl.nu/wowf
  Replies (27) Good night (5486) Bad night (800)
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  (310): View more from California

  Even water is tasting like jack daniels

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  (310): Even water is tasting like jack daniels http://tfl.nu/2l5a
  Replies (15) Good night (4877) Bad night (1251)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.

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  (440): I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues. http://tfl.nu/ej4i
  Replies (5) Good night (2798) Bad night (1081)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?

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  (602): Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again? http://tfl.nu/01x5
  Replies (5) Good night (3363) Bad night (1198)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future

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  (330): He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future http://tfl.nu/ji9u
  Replies (8) Good night (801) Bad night (3621)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.

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  (317): Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week. http://tfl.nu/d9gv
  Replies (21) Good night (6821) Bad night (1114)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."

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  (213): My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie." http://tfl.nu/jevy
  Replies (38) Good night (3644) Bad night (727)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate

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  (920): So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate http://tfl.nu/3qfe
  Replies (1) Good night (1094) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.

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  (+61): only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday. http://tfl.nu/rzvd
  Replies (2) Good night (825) Bad night (385)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.

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  (513): Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation. http://tfl.nu/lwvq
  Replies (3) Good night (1081) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat

  (1-253): View more from Washington

  I think that's a new house record

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  (253): I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat (1-253): I think that's a new house record http://tfl.nu/c3oi
  Replies (3) Good night (780) Bad night (263)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam

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  (402): I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam http://tfl.nu/zq91
  Replies (3) Good night (211) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!

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  (386): Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth! http://tfl.nu/wrvh
  Replies (6) Good night (1215) Bad night (199)

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