Texts From Last Night

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  (602): View more from Arizona

  So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...

  (623): View more from Arizona

  What did she do!?

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I didn't tell her...

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  (602): So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her... (623): What did she do!? (602): I didn't tell her... http://tfl.nu/i351
  Replies (218) Good night (5469) Bad night (24848)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.

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  (301): just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom. http://tfl.nu/qack
  Replies (30) Good night (5440) Bad night (1198)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.

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  (613): I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's. http://tfl.nu/yr3w
  Replies (11) Good night (1134) Bad night (4420)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me

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  (218): i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me http://tfl.nu/gpjb
  Replies (19) Good night (1464) Bad night (5342)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?

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  (231): who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets? http://tfl.nu/3xr9
  Replies (5) Good night (1869) Bad night (1179)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS

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  (301): I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS http://tfl.nu/2dnv
  Replies (8) Good night (2942) Bad night (1080)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...

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  (503): So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address... http://tfl.nu/a3xh
  Replies (7) Good night (1860) Bad night (547)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time

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  (617): Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time http://tfl.nu/k7i2
  Replies (5) Good night (1253) Bad night (646)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.

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  (609): Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good. http://tfl.nu/lsij
  Replies (3) Good night (1325) Bad night (594)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"

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  (305): Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now" http://tfl.nu/z261
  Replies (6) Good night (2261) Bad night (756)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.

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  (404): Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat. http://tfl.nu/fqqq
  Replies (4) Good night (1725) Bad night (632)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.

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  (703): Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate. http://tfl.nu/y8op
  Replies (1) Good night (683) Bad night (324)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.

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  (603): Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn. http://tfl.nu/5a86
  Replies (4) Good night (475) Bad night (699)
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  (229): View more from Georgia

  I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.

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  (229): I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals. http://tfl.nu/jhab
  Replies (1) Good night (592) Bad night (453)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  My dad just said "fuck circus"

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  (773): My dad just said "fuck circus" http://tfl.nu/so9j
  Replies (1) Good night (464) Bad night (190)

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