We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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