i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
the liver wants what the liver wants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize