Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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