dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
