he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
