Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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