ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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