This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
