I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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