New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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