If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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