yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
