We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
