the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize