she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
