i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
