Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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