why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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