So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
