Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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