butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
