Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
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