So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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